Wee Willie John McFadgen was a loyal Orange Prod,
Who thought that Ian Paisley was just one step down from God,
He thought they ate the children in the backwoods of Ardoyne,
And he thought that history started with the Battle Of The Boyne,
He thought that history started with the Battle Of The Boyne.

One day he took a brick in his hand and he dandered up the Falls,
He was mumbling, "Up The Rangers" and humming 'Derry's Walls',
He broke the big shop window to annoy the Pope of Rome,
And he took a rеcord player out and then he startеd home,
He took a record player out and then he started home.

Next night they had a hooley in his local Orange Hall,
Wee Willie took his player to make music for the ball,
He chose a stack of records of a very loyal kind,
But when the music started up he nearly lost his mind,
But when the music started up he nearly lost his mind.

This Fenian Record Player was a rebel to the core,
It played the songs the Orange Hall had never heard before,
For 'Dolly's Braes' and 'Derry's Walls' it didn't give a fig,
And it speeded up 'God Save The Queen' till it sounded like a jig,
It speeded up 'God Save The Queen' till it sounded like a jig.

It played 'The Woods of Upton' and 'The Wearing of The Green',
Such turmoil in an Orange Hall has never yet been seen,
It played 'The Boys of Wexford' and 'The Men of '98',
But when it played 'The Soldier's Song' it sealed Wee Willie's fate,
But when it played 'The Soldier's Song' it sealed Wee Willie's fate.

For the boys were plain demented, to the ground Wee Will was thrown,
They kicked his ribs in one by one to the tune of 'Garryowen',
They threw him out the window to a song about Sinn Féin,
They kicked him all down Sandy Row to 'A Nation Once Again',
They kicked him all down Sandy Row to 'A Nation Once Again'.

This Fenian Record Player was heard no never more,
They prodded it with deacon poles and threw it on the floor,
But still the funniest sight, me boys, that I have ever seen,
For the flashes flying out of it were orange, white and green,
For the flashes flying out of it were orange, white and green.

Wee Willie's up in the mental home crazy as a coot,
He sits there in a padded cell and tootles with his flute,
But when he tries to play 'The Sash' he always gets it wrong,
For halfway through, he always finds he's playing 'The Soldier's Song',
For halfway through, he always finds he's playing 'The Soldier's Song'.

There's a moral to this story what it is I cannot say,
Maybe it's the ancient verse that crime will never pay!
If you ask Wee Willie McFadgen he'll say, "Ah, crime be blowed,
If you want to pinch a record player, do it up the Shankill Road!
If you want to pinch a record player, do it up the Shankill Road!".